How Dude Are You?

Here is a small excerpt from "I'm a Lebowski, You're a Lebowski Life, The Big Lebowski, and What Have You" By Bill Green Ben Peskoe Will Russell Scott Shuffitt.

So just how Dude are you, anyway? Get out your number-two pencils and answer the following questions to discover how in touch you are with your Inner Dude. Report back as soon as it's done.

1. Are you employed, sir?

A) Yes

B) No

C) What day is this?

2. Do you have any Kahlua?

A) No, but I do have some watermelon schnapps

B) No, I'm fresh out

C) Does the pope shit in the woods?

3. What's your favorite Eagles album?

A) Desperado

B) Ride the Lightning

C) I hate the fucking Eagles

4. What do you do in your free time?

A) Balance my checkbook

B) Occupy various administration buildings

C) Bowl, drive around, the occasional acid flashback

5. What is the smallest check you've ever written?

A) $100 and up

B) $ 0.70 to $99.99

C) $ 0.69 and under

6. Identify this small woodland mammal (picture of a ferret)

A) Beaver

B) Ferret

C) Marmot

7. What cassette is in your Walkman right now?

A) I have an iPod

B) Creedence

C) Venice Beach League Playoffs 1987/Bob

8. What is your primary form of ID?

A) Driver's license

B) Expired student ID

C) Ralphs card

9. What color is your vehicle?

A) My Hummer is yellow

B) Blue

C) Green with rust coloration

10. When do you pay your rent?

A) When you own, it's called a mortgage

B) The tenth

C) Far out, man

Tally up your score:

For each A) answer, you get 0 points.

For each B) answer, give yourself 21 points.

For each C) answer, give yourself 42 points.

How Dude are you:

0-105 = You're being very un-Dude

106-210 = You are the walrus

211-419 = I dig your style, man

420 = You abide

So how'd you do? Now that you have a feel for your level of Dudeness, here are some tips for Dude-ifying your everyday life.

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